5 Tips on How to Build Confidence at Work (without Experience)

I know very well that feeling of being a small fish in a big pond.

During my time in the corporate world, I've had the opportunity to connect with amazing people at various levels, from recent grads to top C-level executives.

I've experienced both sides of the business coin, playing roles as both a service provider and a client.

I've come across some really bright, powerful, and influential people and teams in the corporate world.

People with significant corporate achievements and gaining valuable experience.

But here's the real deal, no matter what: every single one of them had their first, newbie, no experience day too.

They know what it's like to be the new kid, not having much experience, and dealing with those moments when they had to build up their confidence. We've all been rookies!

Multiple times in our careers, in fact!

And the cool part?

Titles, experience, levels - underneath it all, we're all just human, and nobody's got it all figured out. We're all in the same boat!

So let's chat about those moments when you kick off your first job, switch up your company, team, or role, and suddenly find yourself back at square one, feeling a bit lost and lacking confidence.

Over the last almost ten years, I've had the opportunity to switch countries, teams, reporting lines, roles, and responsibilities - all within the same company.

Now, you might say I haven't experienced the perspectives of someone who frequently changes employers and starts from scratch each time.

But here's the thing we both know: even within big corporations, different business units, teams, organisations, can have a totally different vibe, dynamic, politic.

So I know well the "starting new" feeling.

Back in the day, I got hired as a pretty junior engineer and then climbed the ranks.

I started as a deployment engineer, handling all the nitty-gritty behind-the-scenes stuff for production infrastructure and application deployments.

My role included monitoring the performance of the infrastructure and application, driving event response, doing routine service and platform maintenance, upgrades, custom code deployments etc. - all for an in-house hosted and managed web content manager product used by largely recognised enterprise customers.

A big chunk of my daily tasks were cut and delegated by more experienced technical folks who were in direct communication and responsible for the technical success of our customers.

It was a personalised managed services technical experience our senior folks were in charge for, and the responsibilities of less experiences engineers - like myself - tended to be a bit on the repetitive side; commonly with documentation and step-by-step guidance provided by our senior colleagues to minimise the risk of our actions.

Yet, there was still a bit of risk in the mix and if you're in the tech world, I'm sure you relate that there are countless instances of those edge cases where runbooks and documentation don't quite cut it when you're in the hot seat troubleshooting a performance issue. Big fun!

So we handled operations, with high risk and visible impact, for big websites and companies in the world.

Some stats for you to get a sense of the impact - there's a study from 2023 by Pingdom that estimates, on average, the cost of downtime across all industries it's about $9k per minute, with some industries and big companies - like airlines - losing even up to $150 million during a five hours of downtime some years ago.

Back then, I didn't interact much with customers directly.

My strength was in the technical behind the scene stuff - that's where I really knew the drills.

And unlike some others, I actually enjoyed the thrill of handling high-stakes operations.

I also fully understood how it could affect our customers and even our own branding any minute of impact.

I was all in, aware of the stakes and the impact it could have.

It was big fun to be honest.

A few years down the road, I stepped up and decided to join the technical customer facing engineering team.

Now, not only was I guiding our customers with best practices, knowledge, and tips, but I was also in charge with the technical nitty-gritty stuff that couldn't be delegated to my previous deployment engineer peers (so my previous role).

Pretty much in charge with the "ugly" and tricky technical situations, truly understanding the ins and outs of our customer's needs and expectations, and coming up with smart, flexible solutions that would benefit both our customers and us. On a daily basis.

The kind of tasks that you couldn't really delegate because they were too grey to even start to explain.

Not to mention that taking this role shifted me from pure technical work to being a customer-facing technical engineer, so a totally different game

So here I am, in my mid-20s, taking on a new role with much more responsibility (and risk), providing technical and personalised technical expertise (hands-on and coaching) and with full responsibility for keeping our customer's platform up and running smoothly.

Exciting times!

To be totally fair, it was quite challenging, lot of pressure and fast reaction, but that's where I shaped most of my skills and developed strong traits in my work personality that I'm most proud of.

This role shift was part of my career growth plan discussed with my management line and throughout the years, I was told that I exceeded expectations in my deployment engineer role and demonstrated all the necessary skills for success in this new position.

I also felt that taking on this role was the right move for me at that point in my career, that I developed the right foundation required to build up the rest of the skills and aspects I needed to succeed in this position; but I was anxious too.

Like with any new role, especially the ones that come with a set of entirely new responsibilities, it felt like I was throwing myself into the lions' den.

Jumping in a big ocean and learning how to swim on the spot while the only thing that gave me the motivation that I won't die is that I've been told that I have what I need to eventually learn to swim. Cool.

Btw, an experienced manager shouldn't throw you too abruptly into the unknown - I strongly believe that, for me, the timing was right, and I had the tools I needed to succeed. But who's not anxious when starting something new?!

So when you find yourself in that position, feeling quite small compared to the world around you, how on earth do you build your confidence without prior experience?

Especially when you are surrounded by other folks with a ton of experience compared to yours?

When you've demonstrated certain skills but haven't actually done it in practice, and it's clear that you're missing some of the required skillset and experiences.

So here are my top tips on how you can build confidence and overcome that sort of anxious sentiment.

These strategies have been helpful for me, and I still use them every day.

Let me start by explaining what I believe confidence means:

Your Confidence = Your Qualities + Your Abilities + Being aware of your current set of qualities and abilities.

(Btw, confidence != arrogance)

You'll start to feel and act more confident when you know your qualities (areas of expertise, knowledge, and interests where you're well-versed) and you have practical hands-on experience with them - abilities.

For instance, while you might have the theoretical knowledge to become a doctor, it's the practical, real-life experience that completes and turns that knowledge into competence.

Once you reach the competence level, and you are aware that you posses such competence, you will bring yourself in a position where you naturally feel confident.

The "being aware of the competence" (so the quality + ability package) is extremely important, and a lot of people neglect it.

Or find it hard to identify those competence areas.

But unless you understand where you excel, how can you ever aspire to build confidence?!

The most common way to become aware of something is by reflecting on your past.

So if you want to build confidence, my friend, that comes with a price tag - you'll need to put in some pre-work.

First of all, you need to sit down with yourself, engage in an honest conversation and while staying humble, write down (or use any method that suits you - speaking in front of a mirror?) the qualities and abilities you currently possess.

If you are interested to build the confidence at workplace, try to focus on the qualities and abilities relevant for your job, but the same system can work regardless of the domain.

If you're not comfortable with this sort of exercises, I have an alternative for you – still not entirely free, but it might feel like a discount :).

Whenever you do something that makes you feel confident, take a moment to write down the specific quality and ability you demonstrated.

When I took the customer facing engineer role, I had no prior customer facing experience.

So I knew I had to become proficient and build the confidence of managing customer communication, on a daily basis, in order to succeed.

But I was terrified.

Plus, when dealing with a high-visibility (and high-value) offering, you often find yourself facing not just one 1 person (aka the customer) but multiple teams and members on the customer side.

Teams that vary in experiences and levels, including C-level executives.

And like any large corporation, there's also your own internal upper leadership to contend with.

In essence, you might feel ... quite small – I certainly did.

We all have moments when we did. And we still do.

On top of all that, English is not my native language, and my vocabulary wasn't tuned for daily interactions with customers.

Not to mention those times when writing and sending post-mortems and reports to high profile people, especially when things were not great with a particular account – those were certainly not my favorite moments.

Sure, I had the support of my management and team.

However, being fully connected and responsible for a customer account, engaging daily with the customer's team, I was the one with the knowledge of what occurred and why for the customers I was responsible for.

In most instances, it followed a top-to-bottom approach, where someone would request a report from me, which was then reviewed, assessed, and eventually shared with others.

There's nothing wrong with that, but as a newcomer, someone who hasn't been through it before, you might not even know where to begin.

What I failed to understand back then is that every member of my team had their first post-mortem report to write, their initial misunderstanding with a client, or a first-time challenge to overcome.

I failed to understand that everyone had their first-time in whatever they were doing..

Like any relatively new person in their career, my network of mentors wasn't extensive enough.

But I wanted to do well and succeed in this new role.

I also had a limited number of questions I felt confident asking others - a limit set by my own self-imposed limitations to avoid appearing dumb.

And I didn't realize back then that being vulnerable and admitting not knowing something, could be such a powerful thing.

The truth is, I haven't witnessed many senior people feeling comfortable showing vulnerability and proactively discussing these things (with confidence 😄) when someone is taking a new role, promoted, or just hired as a fresh grad.

Not many will share upfront the common pains and anxieties a new role will bring at the table.

And in general, it's still a bit taboo to admit that we don't know everything, that we're still figuring things out each day, even if we've achieved significant success so far.

To acknowledge that we still experience moments of anxiety and self-doubt, even with a good title and experience under our belt.

That's the reason I write these blog posts - hoping that someone else, in a similar situation, might come across them and find them helpful.

I wrote them as notes I wished I had access to when I started my corporate career.

To fast track me and my career.

To have the awareness that what I am going through is common. And normal.

And not a characteristic of an under performer. Quite the opposite.

So, in my alone, anxious bubble, feeling somewhat terrified about the upcoming daily customer engagements, I took a moment to list down my qualities and abilities.

I analyzed, as objectively as I could, the qualities and abilities that set me apart and already enabled me to feel and act with some sort of confidence.

I knew I can quickly grasp ambiguous technical concepts and requirements, particularly in performance troubleshooting (an area where many colleagues struggled). What boosted my confidence was having hands-on experience in this field, so I ranked it high on my list.

I had a strong ability to understand our customers' needs and had lot of customer emphaty. Even in my previous role, where I operated behind the scenes and didn't directly interact with customers, I had multiple instances where I demonstrated and succeeded by taking the right approach because I had a solid understanding of what was beneficial for our customers. This was another aspect I added to my confidence list.

I demonstrated a strong end-to-end ownership and a sense of responsibility when given or taking on a task. So, I added this one to my list of confident attributes too.

I was for some time already in that organisation, so I had a solid understanding of the technical possibilities and offerings we could provide to our customers. I also had prior hands-on experience where I came up with creative technical solutions. While not proficient in all cases, I knew I was relatively confident to come up with technical (ninja) options to meet our customer's technical needs.

So with this list, I equipped myself with some confidence tools to navigate through the overwhelming aspects where I felt less confident - direct customer communication.

And I decided to pair them up.

The approach I followed to extend my confidence across other things, like communication, was to identify areas where I felt confident, use them as strengths, and make them the starting point of the show, while practicing the other qualities and abilities until I built confidence in those areas as well.

In situations where I knew someone had a challenging customer conversation due to performance issues (an area where I was confident with), I proactively involved myself.

I teamed up with others to dig into the problem, leveraging that context to listen, observe, and learn how others handled customer interactions.

So while I was focusing on technical hands-on, I also paid attention to their language, negotiation tactics from the meetings, or the tone they used in email exchanges to keep the atmosphere positive.

I incorporated my confidence element - troubleshooting - into a less comfortable context for me - dealing with customers during challenging situations and created in this way a safer and controlled space where I can practice my communication skills, as other peers were in fact responsible with the heavy lifting of communication.

Trust me, when I was identifying the causes of those problems and rescuing our customers from poor performance that could impact their revenue, the fact that my English was not perfect or didn't have an exclusive vocabulary didn't even matter.

But it was a game-changer for me because I could practice and build up my confidence in the safety and comfort of the other skill where I felt confident.

So, the first tip I have for you is to combine an element of high confidence with something you're less comfortable with.

Leverage the power of the strong one to practice and shape the confidence of the one you're still struggling with.

Tip number 2 - identify confidence patterns within yourself and use them as a blueprint to cultivate confidence in another area.

Observe and mirror what you do when you act with confidence.

When you or someone else does something with confidence, take note of the tactics you or they use.

Take note of your posture, what you say, head position, mood.

Pay attention to what you focus on when you talk with confidence.

How do you feel about yourself in those moments?

What do you feel you are capable of in those moments?

Observe the energy around you or those speaking with confidence.

What language, tone or how do you or others articulate things when they lead with confidence?

Though they might seem minor, these details can make a big difference.

Being aware of these aspects can serve as the foundation on top of which you can build the rest of the qualities and abilities you need to develop confidence in another area.

When I have to tackle a challenging conversation or topic, I've seen it's most effective for me to wear something I know makes me feel comfortable and confident.

I take the time to look after myself, put on some make up and give myself a fresh start in the morning.

I basically make sure I feel good with myself before jumping into that situation, whenever possible.

I also prefer to book small meeting rooms to create a comfortable space that doesn't create for me the impression of a space which is big and unapproachable.

Seeking out cozy and small spaces gives me a sense of comfort and security.

On top of all these small elements and details I know working for me, I can further shape and practice the other aspects to deliver difficult messages with more confidence.

Tip number 3 - get moving

No amount of shadowing, books, podcasts, or any other exposure can teach you better than getting started and jumping into the real deal.

Get into action mode and experiment.

Find your style through actual practice.

Tip number 4 - find sponsors, get a mentor, build your network and community

Surround yourself with people.

Find people who have done and gone through what you want to achieve.

Those people that are willing to share the vulnerable part of their story with you.

Become aware of common patterns through other people's experiences by asking about their experience in a given sector or situation.

Tell them that your intention is to be mentored and learn from their experience.

Being vulnerable and acknowledging that you need support and mentorship is powerful.

It can significantly boost your knowledge and experience by simply becoming aware of someone else's story or way of doing things.

Believe me, anyone who has been resilient enough to truly grow and succeed has put in the hard effort and worked through the same challenges with themselves.

Those people will never laugh at you or consider you dumb for asking, as they remember and know very well that they've been in the same position before.

The only people who might try to embarrass or shame you are those who haven't even tried to work on themselves to grow.

Please do ask others, who are willing to share their genuine experiences in a constructive way, how they've navigated similar situations. Ask them for their own tips.

Don't reinvent the wheel and overstress on something that's in fact common.

You'll anyway need to go through that experience yourself because nobody will write that first-time report for you, so better save some energy and fast track you as much as you can through others' experiences.

Nobody will laugh at you if you approach someone you know has that experience already and ask:

"Hey, I need to write this report I know you've done before, but I've never done one myself. What would be your tips for me before I start writing? Is there a specific template or style you recommend or are aware of that might be suitable for this audience?"

In this way, you have high chances of learning from the feedback and guidance that person received when doing those sorts of reports. You can incorporate your own experience, authentic style, and approach, and there you go – you have your first draft ready to be shared with less anxiety.

Tip number 5 - ask others to provide you real time exposure to things you know you're not comfortable or ready for yet.

This way, you can be ahead of the moment when you'll actually need to do them yourself.

This is a great practice I got from my boss - whenever there's an email exchange that contains nothing sensitive but showcases a good learning opportunity for me, my boss would forward it to me as a learning opportunity.

I then review the communication, follow the dialogue, observe how others negotiate, how they come to some sort of agreement and navigate the situation.

I essentially study the style, practices, the language they used, the way they led the discussion, the politics, so that when I encounter a similar situation, it won't feel like an entirely new and unapproachable case to me.

Imagine if someone had shared executive reports and summaries with you years before you even reached the point where you're asked for the first time to draft one.

At that moment, you would be equipped with a comprehensive understanding of how to formulate, bullet point, and articulate your points for such audience.

And you'd still feel nervous, and you might still miss some things, but one thing's for sure: your confidence would not be 0.

I also ask my team, my boss, peers around me, people with levels above or below me or cross-functional team members, mentors, to be exposed in a shadow capacity whenever I hear them discussing an interesting situation, presentation, or something they're working on that would be beneficial for me to build certain qualities and abilities.

The more you intentionally expose yourself in advance to some of the things you aspire to do, the more chances you have to practice certain skills in a much more controlled environment and make your first-time situation less of a brand new impossible thing.

Confidence at work can be complicated for many of us, but I hope I managed to share some real-life experiences and tricks that might be helpful for you to build up those skills and overcome a lack of confidence.

That's it for this note, my friend, I'll see you next week.

-Luciana